A world keeps moving; even at rest it's moving
A screaming sky, flock of feathers
Even perched on strong branches they sway
The wheel and its spokes forever turning
A world is for it cannot not be
In movement eternal nothing is held back
Moments can't be captured
A sun breathes, a heart beats
For all things long to be and witness their own being
Rivers flow and never cease
The ground buckles and it itself flows
And drought can only redirect what always was there
All for the sake of this moment:
Unending and moving forward, yet forever at my grasp
Moments can't be captured
Forever ten thousand things form and unform
And the moment is eternal.
Comments
Displaying 3 of 3 comments ( View all | Add Comment )
Keşiş
I wish we could favorite the beautiful moments we’ve lived through and relive them over and over again
JorgeGlute
sooo ill try to understand each stanza, please dont hesitate to correct me !
i love the first stanza, the transition (the flock of feathers = the birds) between the sky and earth (the strong branches) is very smooth.
the wheel, that i interpreted for time, will always move, and cannot be held back. a world cannot not exist, as in, nothing is not nothing, because it is nothing. an asserting position on our world that it exists.
time cannot be captured, and the world lives (sun breathes = nature, the heart beats = the living). i love the link between the two, and how you give a "living" verb to the sun, and a "non-living- verb to the living. every living being wants to live, they want to be there because life is precious. i dont quite get the "be their own witness" part, but id love to hear its meaning !
the last stanza, i love how you combine fluidity with solidity, flow with drought, river with ground, i really feel the opposition in images youre creating in this last one.
i feel like the fluidity of how you read the poem could improve, for example, the 6th line comes breaking the fluidity of the first 5, which works if it is intended. "Moments can't be captured" is hard on every first letter, the lips need to make a very different position for each one. id personally add more ponctuation to take some breaths.
it is a very philosophical poem. i love the subject of time. idk if it is hard to understand because i usually read poems in french, but it was really fun to break it down, or at least try to !
is there a reason you decided to make 3 stanzas with 3 verses and the last one 5?
>the wheel, that i interpreted for time, will always move, and cannot be held back. a world cannot not exist, as in, nothing is not nothing, because it is nothing. an asserting position on our world that it exists.
The only constant in life is change. Eternal movement.
>the world lives (sun breathes = nature, the heart beats = the living)
>i dont quite get the "be their own witness" part, but id love to hear its meaning !
2 ideas. First, we exist in this form because the Sun breathes energy on this planet, but there are many other things coming together like Jupiter herding asteroids away so they don't clash with us and so many many other phenomena interdependent with each other like plants converting sunlight to consumable food and so on.
Second, the universe splits into living and non-living, but both come from the same spring hence witnessing itself.
> i really feel the opposition in images youre creating in this last one.
River and riverbed create each other by contrast. Interdependent and molded by each other similar to what I said earlier.
>i feel like the fluidity of how you read the poem could improve
I'm surprised you found any fluidity to begin with lol. I wrote it as it came to me. If I tried harder to be more fluid it would have lost meaning.
>is there a reason you decided to make 3 stanzas with 3 verses and the last one 5?
I added another 3 verse stanza at the end just moments before you wrote this comment, but no reason. I don't give much thought to the structure
I like the "moments can't be captured" verse even if it sounds clunky like you said but it's sort of a mantra to keep me grounded in the present. Besides, it's part of the core message. That unending moment forever in our grasp. Just live in the moment and watch the world unfold. Here and now
by Lapix; (edited); Report