Yes I do think its bad for a 20 yo and a 17 yo to date or have sex. Yes I think its bad for a 30 yo and a 18 yo to date or have sex. BUT ISTG IF ANY OF YOU GUYS CALL THOSE PEDOPHILIA I WILL FUCKING EXPLODE.
First of all, pedophilia usually refers to the attraction to prepubescent children and early pubescent children(I'd say 7 to 14 yo) so I feel a bit uneasy over people using it to refer to something like 16 yo x 21 yo but I get it and its in the worldwide termonology enough that I get numb to it.
But heres my maine reason why I hate it. It feels like it babies older teens. Also it feels like people will only take these age gaps seriously IF you make the younger one seem like a 7 years old. Like what?
I also feel like it kinda downplays what actual pedophilia is. Like now, you wont realise how deeply fucked up 6 yo x 41 yo is if now everything is pedophilia. Im just saying, the law puts child sexual abuse differently as sexual abuse of an adult for a reason.
Also when I was 13 to 14 I got sexually groomed by a fuck ton of adults and when I was 16 I dated a 21 yo so like >_>.
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law
i feel like what’s actually happening here is the issue of ‘adultifying’ teens too much. your brain doesn’t finish developing until you’re what, 25? when that highschool kid makes the decision to sleep with someone in their 30s it’s probably not the most rational one. 17 to 20 pushes it, but 18 and 30 is fucking diabolical and you accepting that is genuinely self destructive, and im saying this as someone who did have romantic intentions once for someone far older than me
V8Muscle
I tink da reason y ppl label 16 x 21 n etc as pedophilia is bc teens r usually naive n dont understand da wrongs of dating a adult, I am not guilting dem but just a possible explanation to y.
Astroflash
Facts!
javo
I agree with you that not every age gap should be labeled pedophilia but you lost me at 18 and 30.
There is no reasonable world where a 30yo should be pursuing an 18yo. You have to ask how that even happens. Where do they meet? What do they genuinely connect over? They’re in completely different social spaces and mental stages.
At 18, you’re finishing high school, starting college, maybe taking a gap year. At 30, you’re working full-time, paying bills, managing adult responsibilities, maybe going out on weekends if you have the energy. The lifestyles don’t overlap in a natural or healthy way. You can’t realistically “run into” 18yos casually at 30 UNLESS you’re actively seeking them out or not participating in age appropriate spaces yourself.
And I don’t agree that calling out a 30×18 relationship somehow downplays real child sexual abuse. When I read 30×18, it’s disturbing. But when I read 6×41, it’s horrifying. Nobody is desensitized to that unless something is seriously wrong with them. There is no framing where a 41yo with a 6yo could ever seem normal or debatable to a healthy person.
So no, recognizing that 18×30 is predatory doesn’t erase how DEEPLY SICK 6×41 is. Both can be wrong for different reasons, and acknowledging one doesn’t minimize the other
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