Everything is a touch that isn't a touch. Hands that press down, grip tight, but not to hold— to claim. Feel it? Like a shadow slipping under your skin, like chains that don’t rattle but keep pulling, pulling until there's nothing left but tension. Every time the skin brushes against skin, every hug, every embrace, feels like a test. Is it safe? Is it real? Or will it tear you open again?You hug from behind, because if you don’t, you can’t stop the thought: “What if they hurt you again?” But whe... » Continue Reading
Modernity is plagued by use of the vague, disagreeable terms, boyfriend and girlfriend, which have now become the colloquial categorization for any human relationship that is considered committed yet not married. Sub-categorizations exist among the youth and in pop culture, such as even more diminutive terms like situationship, or the concept of a "friend with benefits." Each of these terms is looser and more unsubstantial than the last. They provide the interpreter of the language with very lit... » Continue Reading
I fell in love with him like the moon falls for the tide— Always pulling, always reaching, but never touching. Last year, when the world still made sense and I could breathe without him, I didn’t know the storm I was walking into. Now, my heart is a ship lost at sea, Tossing in waves of thoughts of him, And no matter how far I try to sail,He’s the shore that I can’t find.If love were an organ, he would be the heartbeat, The one that keeps the blood rushing through my veins, Even though we’re mil... » Continue Reading
They’re angry at mebecause I told the office.Because I wanted safety.Because I refused to be silentwhile they planned to ruin me.They wanted to cancel me.Tell the school.Bring up my past.Tell my seventh grade friendsthings I barely survived.I lost someone.I lost a friend.They forget—I have a heart.I’m a person.I have problems.I have mental illness.They call me selfish.Narcissistic.Blind.Clueless.They side with Raisin—who's cheating,who’s assaulted people,but I’m the monsterfor speaking up,for fe... » Continue Reading
pmopmopmopmo—the noise i hear before i fall asleep,the noise i hear when i wake up.maybe PTSD. maybe C-PTSD. maybe just me.i don’t know anymore. i don’t want to know.labels don’t change that my chest keeps caving in.you tell me stop flirting. stop asking for hugs.you said it once, Will,and my brain wrote it in fire across the sky.so now Vinne doesn’t exist.better she be a ghost than i get crucified for breathing wrong.if pretending she isn’t real makes you shut up,then fine. she isn’t real. she’... » Continue Reading
Yeah,I almost fucking died Saturday night,From a goddamn Sharpie.The smell was thick like regret,clogged my throat like lies do.Right arm? Numb.Legs? Jelly.Chest? Heavy.Fell on the floor,twice down the stairs.God was busy but I was begging anyway.I dragged myself to Grandma—retired nurse, sharp as vinegar.Told her I couldn’t breathe,that I felt like death,words slurring like my future.She asked,“Did you OD on your anxiety pills?”No, I swear, it was the Sharpie.She said, “Stop lying.”But I wasn’t... » Continue Reading
it’s 2:16pm.i took too many pills last night.again.i thought i’d sleep it off.but i didn’t sleep.i just woke up in pieces.my teeth won’t stop chattering.my body won’t stop shaking.i’m freezing but sweating.my thighs are cold like metaland it hurts.from my lower stomachall the way up.like something’s pulling,tightening,trying to crack me open from the inside.i can’t swallow right.my throat’s drybut when i try to drinki forget how to do it.i forget how to just… be a body.i don’t know if this is a ... » Continue Reading
i remember the silence—the heavy, choking silence that swallowed me whole,the way the world grew so large and dark,too much for a four-year-old who never asked to be born.there was a shadow—a man who should have been safe,but instead tore pieces from my small body,twice.once i remember.once i don’t.and that forgotten part is the cruelest scar—the one that haunts me with questionsi have no answers for.this is child sexual abuse.it’s a wound i carry inside me every day,sometimes hidden beneath a f... » Continue Reading
I have decided that this Rocky plush will be a mix of his movie and book version, so now he has a sweater!! I had also added the grooves in one of his arms! Soon will be the slots on the top of him!If anyone has any suggestions for other book or movie details to add PLEASE comment them on any of my Rocky posts. If I do ur suggestions, I can mention u in the post if u want!!Ttyl!! » Continue Reading
When I was four or five,fresh from foster care,we returned to your apartment—cramped, cracked, suffocating.Walls soaked in your rage,the air thick with anger’s shadow,your fists pounding walls you couldn’t strike through,because Mom took the blows instead.I remember those nights —my older brother beside me,breath shallow, eyes wide,listening to voices erupting like thunder,the storm never ceasing,rage bouncing off the ceiling,shattering glass and silence alike.Is it normal, Dad,to grow up where ... » Continue Reading
Recent Entries
Pinned Blogs
Most Kudos
Most Comments
Back to Top
- by <3 VANDY / / VAV ˚.⋆ֹ
- 0 Comments- 0 Kudos
- by 
- by